I always think about making a list of New Year's resolutions. The post-Christmas week of TV always focuses on this while Matt and Meredith (sorry GMA fams, I'm a Today Show gal) lend their anchor spots to those lesser-known stars while they enjoy a week of vacation. Inevitably, we always see some poor unknown reporter out on the street asking anyone who walks by what their New Year's resolution will be. Normally, it's really boring and predictable answers like, "lose weight" or "stop biting my nails." Not that those aren't admirable goals, but they do leave a bit to be desired. It seems that the more general the goal is, the less likely it is to be accomplished. What can I say, I'm a detail oriented person. More detail means more chance of it getting done. And isn't that the point of a New Year's resolution anyway? Something you want to proudly move to the "Done" category?
Being the true, deep down nerd that I am, I decided to look up the definition of the word, "resolution." There are a lot of them. But I searched around for the one that seemed (to me, at least), to really encompass the meaning within a New Years' resolution. Here's what I got ...
-the resulting state.
For a girl so keen on detail, I picked the broadest definiton in the history of definitions. Maybe I'm not as detailed as I thought. But this definition really spoke to me in terms of creating my own New Year's resolution this year. A resolution is just that - a resulting state. After this coming year has passed, what do I want my resulting state to be? Where do I want to be when I sit here, one year from today, with yet another year behind me? Once you are married with children, the years can all of a sudden start to run together. I can't tell you how many women come up to me and tell me how they love watching or seeing my kids because it reminds them of their own children. They always say something like, "My kids are in high school now, but it seems like just yesterday that they were that young." Time seems to fly once you start a family and get drawn into the busy-ness and activity of a normal and mundane life.
Thinking about these things is what helped me formulate my resolution for 2011. I do not want to be mundane. I do not want all the days to run together. I do NOT want to be the mom whose kids grow up amidst the business of Target shopping trips, T-ball, and carpools. Sure, those are parts of everyday life and things that will need to be done, but I don't want those everyday things to BECOME our life. I want to love my husband and children, and I want them to know it is happening while I am doing it. When my children are older, I want them to remember being loved by their Mom. I want them to remember affection and peace and laughter in their home. My resolution for 2011 and beyond is to create a resulting state of joy, warmth, and devotion in my family's life.
Now, as I said before, those big picture type of resolutions seem to be the ones that are always the hardest to attain. To try and make mine a little more reachable, I wanted to try and break it down into ways that I could go about making my resolution a reality. So here goes ... the ways I am planning on trying to create a resulting state of joy, warmth, and devotion in my home. These may seem like small things, but I think they will add up to the result I'm hoping to create ...
- Be sure to hug and kiss my kids and husband at least 3 times a day each. I won't be keeping a running tally or anything, but I believe affection is most felt when it is frequent.
- Tell my husband and children I love them every day.
- Spend a few uninterrupted minutes of one-on-one time with each child every day.
- Talk about Jesus with my children every day. Teach them about having a personal relationship with Him.
- Discipline without yelling. Express displeasure in a calm and teaching manner.
- Show affection and love (the G-rated version, of course) with my husband in front of my children. We are the most important model for marriage that they will have in their life.
- Create an atmosphere of comfort in our home by making it a place we want to be and enjoy coming home to.
- Love the life we are currently living without feeling rushed to get to the next step or next milestone.
These are just starting points, but I feel they are all instrumental in helping me create the type of life I want for my family in 2011. I want to be present in my husband and childrens' lives so I don't become that woman in 10 years who is wondering where her kids' childhoods have gone. I don't want to miss things ... even the things that seem normal and routine. I am making memories for myself and my family and I want to remember as much as I can. By creating a home filled with affection, laughter, joy, and peace, I am helping to create a childhood and marriage that my children and husband will (hopefully) not forget. And isn't that what we all desire ... treasured memories of our family? It's the one thing no one can take away from us no matter the circumstances. Those memories will be with us until we are old and they will be passed on to our children's children by the way they will make us live our lives for years and decades to come.
So bring it on 2011, I'm ready for you. If all goes well, I'll be sitting here one year from now reflecting on all the wonderful family memories of the past year. The fun part, creating those memories, is just about to begin!